Tag Archive | relationships

Do differences in learning style preferences affect relationships?

Do you want to weigh in on this topic? I’ll start by giving you my answer, “Yes.” This is not based on any scientific studies but totally on personal experience. My husband and I have been married for a long time and though we have had some ups and downs, we are more in love today than ever. That said, our learning styles have impacted our relationship and perhaps even caused some of those blips in the road.

You see, my husband is a visual learner. Give him a book or show him a diagram and he has whatever the task or skill mastered. I, on the other hand am an auditory learner. I can listen to the radio, a conversation or presentation, and I have the concepts and examples down pat. Give me a book, and it takes a lot longer unless I read it aloud.

I know there are divided schools of thoughts on learning styles and their impact on the way kids/students/adults learn, but I think they have merit. There are three basic styles, auditory, kinesthetic (hands on) and visual. Each person responds better to one or the other. It does not necessarily mean that a person cannot learn if material is offered in a medium contrary to his/her style preference, it just takes longer.

For example, if my husband wants to share information with me, he will print it off and hand it to me or send me a link to a website. I will take the information, but I do not get as much (if anything) from it because it is one more thing to read. Although I enjoy reading, it is not my favorite way to learn, so I’ll put it on the back burner. If he would tell me what excited him about the information or how it is relevant to me/us, I am can absorb it quickly and am more likely to pick up what he’s handed me in visual format so I can learn more.

Because I can pick things up from the auditory messages that surround me, I assume he’s hearing it too. When I share information, I try to explain it to him and it goes right over his head. He’d prefer if I’d write it down or send him a link.

Now that we are spending a lot more time together (the kids are gone), we are relearning how to communicate and knowing our learning styles and preferences is making the transition a lot easier. Now I understand why he gives out books for gifts and why he prefers to print and share, so I’ll send him links, etc. He’s learning too, and we talk a lot more. He understands I need to have things explained verbally in order for me to get it. You know, I think our marriage will work after all.

Changing your current direction

Have you ever hit one of life’s plateaus? You know, those times when you want to move forward but seem to lack motivation.

My first recommendation would be to direct you to the Lord and the Bible. The Scriptures will provide what you need. Sometimes, however, you may desire to look at the life of someone who applied what he or she learned from the Word to see just how that worked for them. One of these people is Jim Rohn. As you look at his life, you may discover a quotation – he has many – to get or keep you on track as well as provide support for your ideas and projects in concise and direct terms.

During his life, Jim Rohn mentored thousands in the realm of business performance and personal development through individual contact, seminars, workshops, books and recorded presentations. His unique style coupled with his ability to apply wisdom to principles and events made him renowned as America’s foremost business philosopher. His common-sense approach and proven methods provided both personal success and wealth as well as for those who adopted his methods.

Jim tackled tough topics like leadership management, work ethics, change, motivation, learning, goals, success, relationships, results and more. Though he has recently passed on, his words continue to ring true and bear continual review and repetition.

You can Google Jim Rohn to find many outstanding quotes that you can use in your writing, presentations, or for personal development, and when applied, they may open the door to further opportunities. I’ll leave you with just one.

It is our philosophical set of the sail that determines the course of our lives. To change our current direction, we have to change our philosophy not our circumstances.”

 ~ Jim Rohn

A thunderous gift

I awoke this morning to flashes of light and booming claps of thunder. The rain poured down, and my spirits followed with each drop. Later the storm cleared, the sun came out and my spirits rose with the warmth of the day. So what was the difference? My health, my relationships, my finances remained the same, yet the sense of well-being seemed to follow the light.

Perhaps the real issue had to do with my perspective. Subconsciously, I saw the gloomy morning as a hindrance, a force out of my control, preventing me from something – like going outside of my comfort zone. After all, if I went outdoors, I’d be required to carry an umbrella or wear a raincoat. I would not need these items if it were sunny. In other words, I was looking at what I could not do instead of what I could or what benefit this rain would bring.

As a matter of fact, the strawberries I had transplanted had begun to shrivel up for lack of water. The pollen count continued to creep higher because there had been no rain to knock it out of the air. Oh, and there were other things I could do as well. I did have to venture out in the rain, but my car – currently parked inside a garage – would keep me safe and dry, as well as get me to my destination. The more I think about it, this storm was God’s gift.

Sometimes it takes me a while to make lemonade from life’s lemons. I’m glad the Lord is patient to wait for me to see the light.

Is there a GPS for life?

If you’ve ever gotten caught in a strange city during rush hour, you know how easily frustration and that sense of being out of control can quickly overwhelm you.  Your grip tightens on the wheel as you struggle to figure out where you are.  You sense your blood pressure rise as you realize you’re headed in the wrong direction.  You can’t stop.  You can’t change lanes.   You’re stuck.  You can follow the throng, but who knows where those crazy drivers will lead you or if you can get back to familiar territory?  If you can relate, then you know how having a GPS can save the day or relieve your temporary insanity.  It helps you refocus and get back on track.  

The economy, health concerns, relationships and other circumstances often push us into life’s traffic jams and take us down roads we’d not choose on our own. I’ve been there and you have, too, but have you ever thought about the Bible as the Lord’s GPS (God’s Pointer System)?  Not only can it identify my current position, but it also provides exactly what I need (emotionally, physically and spiritually) to get back on course. 

When I lose my way, become confused, or even discouraged about the negatives in life, the Bible offers me His correction, instruction and encouragement. Although it’s critical to spend regular time reading and studying the Scriptures, I think it’s also important to realize this may not always be enough. When life’s traffic gets me in a bind, I need to recognize it and my need to pull out the GPS. Then as I submit to His words, my frustration begins to melt and my grip relaxes.  My blood pressure returns to normal, and I begin to experience His peace.  The circumstances may remain unchanged, but I’ve allowed God to restore control.  Will I always understand what path I’m on? Probably not, but I can trust the one who allowed it. In fact, I tried it again today and it worked!

So the next time you’re stuck in traffic, think about the Lord’s GPS and trust Him to guide you in the paths of righteousness.